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((This is now an RP journal for tanzrp .))

Sundry notes
Do you believe in monogamy?
I'm beginning to think I believe in it the same way children believe in Father Christmas. I'm hoping that if I clap my hands, it will be real.

Or wait, was that fairies that method is intended for? (And no one had better say anything snide regarding my choice of words.)

In other news, I have already grown tired of this Godforsaken island. I have been here for a grand total of three days and already I have been robbed of my cloak, my hat, and my ribbon, and the collection of untended treasures I have discovered laying about does not make up for their loss. Strangely enough, I find the cloak the least unfortunate loss. Without my hat or a ribbon, my hair goes absolutely berserk. One moment it's entirely well-behaved and hanging there as it should; and the next, it's in my face and hopelessly tangled from the wind out here. I didn't mind having it loose back at home, but it's proving so maddening while travelling that I may simply have it cut off. I would spare myself a great deal of trouble by doing so, but I am a bit reluctant nonetheless. It's so HARD to make decisions of this sort when one doesn't even have a reflection.

Have spoken with Herr Veidt again. I fear I may not be as enamored of him as I thought, and I do not know if this is a good thing or not. I am still terribly fond of him, of course.


A curse on the entirety of Creation. I'm going to find someplace to lay down and hope that by the time I wake up I'll be more decisive.


I feel as if I have wandered into a dream, as though everything at last is falling into place and being exactly as it should be.

I spent the night with Herr Veidt, and he is allowing me to stay with him.

I love him, I truly do, and while he insists he doesn't love me, I suspect he's in denial. Why else would he carry on calling me a nice boy, saying I am good-looking, attempting to... distract me?

And even if he's telling the truth, I don't see why things cannot continue with this delicate arrangement we have arrived at. I am perhaps unsuitable for anything greater than being his companion and friend (and occasional vessel for him to act out his desires upon), and I should remain happy even if this is the extent of the relationship.

I cannot wait to write to Vati and tell him what has happened. He will be so pleased. It may not be mutual love (yet!), but it is certainly settling down.
((OOC: It wasn't until after I'd written this that I realized how much this makes me think of this.))



I haven't been this excited since Alfred arrived at the castle people's perception of my taste in clothes graduated from unfashionable to vintage.

I mustn't make a fool of myself, or overreact, but he is terribly good-looking and intelligent and he initiated it, not me. I don't know the last time anyone flirted with me!

Maybe I'm not as hopeless as I thought. Maybe this was actually a good idea, and I'll never have to go back to staying in my room all the time and hoping Vati will bring some dinner up.

Call me sentimental, but I think I'm in love.

Assessing the situation
On one hand, Alfred is here, and I do not think I want to have to deal with what he did to my heart all over again.

On the other hand, so is a devastatingly attractive man with a glowing cat.

I do not know how to react.

(no subject)